Going through a high-conflict divorce is a lot like swimming in a pool of sharks. It is dangerous, stressful and frankly unfathomable to most who have never swam there.
Stop being a lone wolf
It is hard to speak to anyone when you are in the trenches of a high-conflict divorce battle. I speak to drowning swimmers every day who are desperately seeking a lifeline. If you think you can do this on your own, you may be wrong. Often you need help. There is no shame in that! Enlist the troops to help you through the battle. But…be discerning, because many professionals and friends will have no idea of the danger of your journey.
Most of my clients are a lot like me. Nice, educated, kind people in a terrible situation. Again…there is no shame in that. There is no need to hide your malignant divorce journey. Again…just be selective with whom you share your story.
If you are navigating a high-conflict divorce battle, I am inviting you to my private facebook group here. I supervise the group carefully, post excellent content, and get rid of any bad eggs!
Invest in some help
Unless you enjoy driving on a dark road not knowing where you are going, you might want to hire someone to help you navigate. Think of it like having a “tour guide” of the high-conflict divorce journey. Someone who can stop you before you make a wrong turn. Someone who will point out the potholes before you drive though one and destroy your suspension.
I am talking about a Divorce Coach of course, and preferably one who understands high-conflict divorce. A person who will be able to predict your ex’s next step and have you armed and ready. I like to think my biggest contribution is preventing my clients from making mistakes while helping them remember to breathe.
Do everything in your power to stay healthy. There is no bigger gift that you can give your children than a healthy parent that finds pleasure in living life. Remember that you are the barometer of your house.
Take the time and expense to do the things that keep you well. Exercise. Make sure that you are getting reasonable nutrition, sleep and water. Throw in some yoga and therapy for good measure.
There are many free online resources that focus on emotional wellbeing. Narcissistic Abuse Recovery videos, my blogs, my monthly Ask Stacey classes. I have a pretty inexpensive but amazing course called Divorce Survival Kit that will teach you everything you need to become emotionally healthy and resilient.