March 10, 2020 Stacey Mendelson 0 Comments

Any hockey fans amongst my Divorce Warrior Posse?

If so, you may have heard that Jim Little, the CEO of the Ottawa Senators was recently fired after only 8 weeks on the job.

Apparently, he and the owner of the Senators had a profanity-laden argument over the phone in February. According to the team owner, Little was yelling at him for most of the call, and made several insulting and derogatory comments.

Posting about your ex on social media

There may be more to the story than this. The investigation by the NHL franchise uncovered several allegations of harsh or abusive behaviour, including public claims of domestic abuse from his former wife Lara Smith.

Lara blogged about their short but turbulent marriage on her blog in August 2019. Here is a snippet:

“As the weeks and months unfolded, I was the victim of extreme control, psychological, and at times, physical abuse. Going to yoga class and the grocery store were cause for outbursts of rage.”

If you would like to read the rest of this important article by Lara Smith, designed to support women experiencing intimate partner violence, click here.

What goes around comes around

These detailed allegations from his ex-wife coupled with his pattern of behaviour within the NHL was extremely concerning to the Senators. Isn’t it comforting to watch when karma takes over?

Many people in a divorce battle against a vicious opponent hope for karma – a law of cause and effect – to occur. Really, they are hoping for the universe to punish their ex for their abusive behaviour. Often, over time, as with Little, the mask will fall off and they will be exposed.

How do you want to show up?

I am not certain as to where I stand on the theory of what goes around comes around, but I do have a few thoughts to share:

  • There is never a downside to watching how you behave with others. This includes your lawyer, custody assessor, judge and even your ex.
  • We are responsible for our experience in life.
  • We will always show up as our best self when we are coming from positive thoughts and emotions. Even when you are sharing your story about your ex, you can come from a place of curiosity and compassion that will serve you so much better than hatred and bitterness.
  • We can move forward with self respect, self love and chose to believe that the universe will look after the rest.